WANTED: A woman prepared to chainsaw a man in half and be squashed down to the height of a house brick.

Interested? Good.

Because Melbourne-based magician Tim Ellis, 34, is seeking an athletic, adventurous, tight lipped female assistant.

As well as the above requirements, the successful applicant must be about 163cm tall.

"The illusions were built for my first assistant, so everyone since has had to be about her height," said Ellis.

He said the opportunity had arisen since his former assistant, er, disappeared.

He reckons she won a place in the Singapore production of the musical Jospeh and the Technicolor Dreamcoat, but I have my suspicions.

"The right person has to be able to perform in the illusions and entertain the crowd," he said.

"She needs an open mind and to be positive."

At one point in the act the assistant will be required to pick up a chainsaw and slice her boss in half. Which some women would probably enjoy.

"She needs to be quite a confident girl because it is a real chainsaw," said the mad magician.

Ellis said it would take about six weeks for the new assistant to master an illusion like the 'Squash' box - in which she is placed into a metal box and reduced to a height of about 20cm. I'd hate that.

But what, I asked, is the most important quality the perfect assistant must exhibit?

"She must be able to keep a secret," he said.

And look better than Alexander Downer in fish-net tights, perhaps?

Sue-Anne Webster is special: she can be just 20cm tall, levitate, and is pretty nifty with a chainsaw.

Which is why Melbourne magician Tim Ellis chose her from a field of hundreds to be his new assistant.

It was in January that I told you about Ellis, 34, from Northcote. He had made his previous assistant disappear, and was in a bit of a pickle.

He told me he needed someone fit, short and confident. And as if by magic, Sue-Anne appeared.

"I'd heard of Tim but never met him." Sue-Anne, 27, from Sydney told me yesterday.

"I read that he needed an assistant. I called, and we met at a magicians' convention in Sydney."

It was a partnership made in heaven: Tim wanted somebody to squash, Sue-Anne wanted somebody to saw in half. Perfect.

Sue-Anne has been practising magic for 10 years.

She also works part-time as a copyright officer in Sydney, and spends several days each week in Melbourne performing or rehearsing.

Already, as our picture shows, Sue-Anne has mastered Ellis' trademark illusion - the dreaded Squash.

"I had never seen anything like it in my life," she said. "It took a little while to master. At first I could only get down to 12 inches."

"I used to do gymnastics when I was younger so I was fit and strong, but not very flexible." She is now.

Sue-Anne's favourite illusion, however, is the one where she saws Ellis in half with a chainsaw.

"I really like it," she said.

Magician Tim Ellis is entranced - with his talented assistant Sue-Anne Webster.

Ellis, who will produce a rabbit from a paper cup at the drop of a top hat, says he plans to marry Sue-Anne on August 8.

Whereupon the tricky couple will "disappear from the face of the earth" for a few days, he tells me.

The nifty Northcote conjurer blames me, incidentally, for his delightful predicament.

In January, I wrote of Ellis' search for a new assistant. In May I was able to report his search was successful and that Ms Webster was just the ticket.

But how was I to know the sort of spells she planned to weave?

"I'm very cynical and sceptical in many ways," said Ellis yesterday. "But this is one piece of magic I can't explain. And I don't even want to know how this was done."

Ellis and Sue-Anne now plan to turn their stage show into a "two person act" with equal billing - no more maestro and sidekick stuff.

"Sue-Anne has improved my show at least 100 per cent."

"I can see a day when I will end up working as her assistant," he says.

Clearly, he understands what marriage is all about.

Sue-Anne plans to quit her job as a copyright officer and dedicate herself to magic and her acting career. And Tim, I trust.